Well it’s the morning after the SheCan 10k and oh my gosh I feel a mixed bag of emotions. All day yesterday I was mentally preparing myself. Running isn’t just about using your body, it’s a whole mind game as well. I knew that my body was ready, I walked lots over the weekend, managed a 5k Sunday run, medication is sort of working, I have no constant pain at the moment.
But was my head ready for it?
I haven’t run further than 5k since getting ill in September. Well apart from last Monday’s SheCan 4 mile adventure. So even though my body was feeling ready I had to psych myself up. I had to prepare my mind to stay positive through it all. Being an orange hat really helps me with this and I know that I have to be positive in all the runs no matter how tough I am feeling it.
I can tell you now, it was feeling tough.
Towards the end my legs wanted to walk but I didn’t let anyone else know how I felt. I smiled and gave all the encouragement I could give. I am so proud of that because all of the ladies were amazing. But at the same time I am so happy, I also feel gutted. And I know I shouldn’t because I worked hard. But I can’t stop thinking about how this time last year my running life was so much different. I was easily pushing out 10ks at a pace that I was happy with. Last night’s run left me tired and after looking at my watch the pace was the slowest it’s been in years. That’s what I am gutted at. I remember telling the ladies one of my favourite running sayings ‘a 7 minute mile is the same as a 12 minute mile’ it really is but a tiny part of me still thinks I can do better and I will.
So as I sit on the sofa thinking about having a nice walk on a sunny day, I just need to think don’t look back but look forward. I can get better again and I will get better again.
Thanks for reading and happy running!